Want to lose weight? Kill someone. It's easier to lose weight for a trial than for a prom or wedding, or even a class reunion. The new Jenny Craig Watchers comes with a patented knife and an exercise program designed to build upper body strength.
I'm following a local murder trial. At first I ignored it as the ususal domestic violence out of hand murder, but when an acquaintance of mine was supeonaed and I had to go work for her, my interest got a bit piqued.
The defendent is accused of killing her allegedly abusive boyfriend. She testified that she thought her very life was in danger there in the kitchen, so she grabbed the closest knife and beat him to the punch, so to speak. The victim's wife testified that the man himself was prone to being abusive.
Here's the kicker for me. The prosecution accuses the defendent of being coached. Hmm, if I was an undereducated woman of color facing a panel of my "peers" and a bunch of white male attorneys and judges, you know, I would welcome some coaching, wouldn't you? It doesn't take much to walk in this woman's flip flops. She's on trial for her life and the prosecution says she is being coached. Of course she is being coached. Sitting on the witness stand isn't something that comes naturally to most people. I'm sure the ADA "prepped" his or her witnesses as well. The question is, when does prepping become coaching?
But that, in itself, is not the real thing that gets me. The prosecutor accuses the woman of, (I am not making this up) Losing weight on purpose to look better for the jury. As in, Hmm, I'm the defendent in a murder trial next month, I should lose a few pounds. Is there a Weight Watchers group that meets at the County Jail?
If you have EVER tried to lose weight for an event, a STRESSFUL event, you know it's plum near impossible. You would think that if you're the type to put on weight under stress, the idea of having to lose weight to save your life, would be enough stress to undermine the whole process. Not to mention the fact that the jailhouse food most likely isn't the most conducive to weight loss. Just a guess, I've never eaten there, although now I'm curious. If she indeed lost weight that fast to impress the jury, she has a new diet book out tomorrow and it will be a best seller.
Of course, the opposite thing is what I think. If you're facing a trial and 99 years in prison, I'm thinking it's kind of a natural appetite suppressant.
The implications of the ADA's question are stunning:
You can't get a fair trial if you are an overweight black woman. Large women look guilty. If you want to be found innocent, you must look thin and therefore successful.
You can easily drop weight under the stress of trial preparation with minimal effort. No problem. Anyone can do it. Just do the jail house version of Atkins. Ask any woman how easy it is to lose weight for an event. They will gush that whenever there is a major event in their lives, weight just falls off - NOT. Maybe for those people who don't eat when their depressed, but not for stress eaters. I'm thinking that losing weight, while surely helping in personal appearance and first impressions, is more like a symptom than a goal. I'm sure that if I was on trial for murder, losing weight would be the first thing on my mind. And that alone would be a good excuse for the insanity defense.
No comments:
Post a Comment